You got your first shots today

...And I think mom took it harder then you did!!
It just tore at my heart! I had to hold you sitting on my lap facing sideways with your head against my tummy. You were cuddled in and were liking that position. My hand went onto your leg to hold that still while you got the needle. The first needle went in. You cried but then uh-oh...there was a second. You cried even harder. Nothing is more painful then hearing my little boy cry in pain and there was nothing I could do about it.
Then I had to turn you around so she could put TWO MORE in your other thigh! I didn't sign up for this! (well, I did but I tell you just before going in for the appointment I wanted to cancel!)
You were looking up at me, your whole face and head bright red from crying so hard. You looked up at me with those beautiful blue eyes just as the third needle went in and screamed at the top of your lungs and the tears fell. From both of us. I told Daddy that I couldn't do it! One more shot. I was crying good and so were you.
There, the shot was done. I pulled you closer to me and kissed you and hugged you. Then started to feed you. You were still crying and pulling off. Went into the waiting room for our 15 minutes of wait time to make sure there was no reaction and continued to feed. I kept apologizing over and over. Telling you that I was so proud of you and you were so brave. You were such a good boy. So you calmed down and was eating away.
Then I would hear the next baby cry as they were getting their shots and it all would come back to me and I would cry again. Just remembering the way you looked up at me. Those beautiful blue eyes looking beyond your bright red eyelids and face. Looking up at me as if to say, "Mommy make them stop." MAN!! I am still tearing up thinking about it.
You are such a trooper. No Tylenol. Little bit of a fever but we are watching it. Cuddled with a mommy that felt really bad. I even stopped at the rest stop on the way to Aldergrove to make sure that you were ok.
Before we went in I prayed to God for Him to protect you. He did. You took it better then I did. I am already dreading the 4 month shots that are coming up in August.
My little man was cooing and smile before we even left the health unit and as I sit here now you are talking to your duck and smiling away. It really is tough being a parent. How many times can my heart break!?!